Once upon a time, my husband and I looked forward to bedtime. We could put our little boy in his crib, he might cry a little bit, but we didn't have to worry about a thing. We would be able to actually sit and watch a movie without having to get up for anything other than popcorn!
Fast forward to having four kids now and all but one in normal beds.... Can you hear the terrifying sound of violins playing in a minor key, because it's ringing in my ears.
Bedtime has been absolutely awful! Even more so since we moved a couple months ago. This is how it would go, please feel free to look for our mistakes.
Dinner: I suggest we watch a TV Show as a family after we eat.
After We Eat: Clean up doesn't happen and bath time usually got skipped.
Watch TV Show: The boys would fight over where they're sitting, E doesn't sit still (She's not even two yet, who can blame her?) J and I complain because we can't hear what's going on.
Announce Bedtime: As soon as the TV is turned on, T (Our 4 year old) will yell that he wants to watch more, which usually turns into us fighting him. M (Just turned 3) will try to convince us that he's not tired and doesn't want to go to bed. E, seeing what fun her brothers are having, decides she has to run in circles while yelling to add to the noise. The baby is most likely crying, because it's time for her to eat.
Pj's: J gets stuck doing this by himself, because I'm feeding Baby Girl, which means he's having to get the clothes, round up the kids again, and convince the boys to put on their clothes the right way while figuring out E's clothes at the same time.
Prayers and Scriptures: By this time J's frustration has made me frustrated, because I can't do a whole lot with a baby latched onto me. So trying to be spiritual isn't working so great... We each take our turn reading and then pray, which rarely isn't interrupted with one of us telling someone to fold their arms, close their eyes, or get on their knees.
Brush Teeth: Either J or I would be getting the baby dressed while the other takes the kids upstairs to clean teeth. They get hyper, because we're a weird family and good dental hygiene is fun for the kids.
Bed (Dun Dun Duuuun): Give everyone kisses and hugs and tuck them in. J takes his post in the hallway to watch all three and make sure they keep their heads on their pillows and stay quiet. T usually starts the party with bouncing his butt on his squeaky mattress, M kicks his blankets off and holds his feet in the air, and E usually says she has to go potty. Slowly it grows into J yelling at them to stay in bed, and someone sleeping on the floor in the hallway. And that's at 9PM... I eventually take J's spot, because he's so frustrated he can't handle them anymore. I lose my control and usually end up spanking someone or arguing over why they can't have their stuffed animals back. 10PM rolls around and we're both too tired, the kids are usually in bed so tired that they're crying, so we just crash.
Yup. It was bad. And this wasn't even a night that we get home late from my parent's house or some friend's house....
There was one night that we had had enough. J and I were both in tears, because we were tired, the kids weren't behaving well, because they weren't getting enough sleep, and the spirit just wasn't in our home. And I didn't blame him, I didn't even want to be in my house! We did some research and everything we found was routine routine routine. And we did have a basic routine down, even if we didn't watch a show. It would at least be at the scriptures and prayer part. Shouldn't that be enough?! We were almost to the point of asking our doctors if we should drug them, but then my husband found a brilliant article click here to read it.
So we decided to try stimulating them naturally for a couple weeks, before we look at turning to medicine.
Here are our changes:
1 Hour Afternoon Nap
I would let my kids sleep until they woke up and sometimes that would be a couple hours. Nice for me at the time, but made bedtime chaos.
No Screen Time 2 Hours before Bed!
With the way screens work, the colors of the light coming off the screen actually stimulates our brains. Giving them that 2 hour break gives them a head start on calming down.
Dim the Lights When Starting the Routine
It's summer time right now, so they don't understand that even though the sun is up, they need to sleep.
Read Quiet Books
We learned that even with reading, we need to make sure they aren't our silly books. If it's too silly, they get too stimulated.
Darken the Room Right Before Putting Them to Bed
Limit Talking to Them After Saying Goodnight
No more arguing. We say, lay down or Shhh and that's it.
In the Morning Open the Curtains to help them wake up
My kids get grumpy when woken up, so I let nature do it's thing with sunlight. Their bodies think it's time to wake up, not Mommy.
All these changes have helped so much! We know it'll take some time for their bodies to adjust, but just with these little changes we've seen results.
I'll have to make a post on our bedtime routine, because nap time's over (Hour's Up).
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